As an internet wellness advocate and mom, let me start with this: TikTok and Snapchat aren't evil. But it’s not safe for your third grader or my fifth grader to do dance challenges unsupervised and doom scroll either. If you’ve ever found yourself saying, “Oh, they’re just scrolling—it’s harmless,” you’re being naive!!
Let’s get real: handing these apps over to younger kids is like giving them the keys to a car before they’ve had driving lessons and Snapchat makes kids think their snaps disappear forever, but that’s simply not true. Screenshots, screen recording, or third-party apps can save snaps without even notifying the sender. This false sense of privacy can lead to risky behavior and even extortion. Here are three solid reasons why your kids don't need these apps too soon:
1. The Algorithm Is a Master Manipulator
TikTok specifically doesn’t just show funny dog or cooking videos. Its algorithm hooks users with hyper-curated content. The problem? Your child’s developing brain isn’t equipped for the infinite scroll, fostering obsession with trends instead of balance. Five minutes turns into five hours, and suddenly your kid knows all about conspiracy theories, and "who did what to who," but hasn’t touched their math homework. And, Snapchat's Discover page often promotes content that’s inappropriate for kids, such as sensationalized news stories, gossip, and explicit videos. Younger kids lack the critical thinking skills to filter through this content responsibly.
3. Stranger Danger Is Very Real
And one of the most obvious - TikTok and Snap are both public platforms where strangers can comment, message, and interact with posts and your child. And Snap adds another insidious level because, the content and messages disappear. Snapchat’s Snap Map feature lets friends see exactly where your child is in real time. While this may seem harmless, and can be helpful - it also exposes them to potential safety risks.
1. The Algorithm Is a Master Manipulator
TikTok specifically doesn’t just show funny dog or cooking videos. Its algorithm hooks users with hyper-curated content. The problem? Your child’s developing brain isn’t equipped for the infinite scroll, fostering obsession with trends instead of balance. Five minutes turns into five hours, and suddenly your kid knows all about conspiracy theories, and "who did what to who," but hasn’t touched their math homework. And, Snapchat's Discover page often promotes content that’s inappropriate for kids, such as sensationalized news stories, gossip, and explicit videos. Younger kids lack the critical thinking skills to filter through this content responsibly.
2. Dangerous Trends Aren’t Just “Trendy”
From Tide Pod challenges to “devious licks,” TikTok and Snapchat have a history of glorifying unsafe ideas. Younger kids and even tweens lack the critical thinking skills to spot danger. Snapchat’s streaks and group chats can intensify social pressures. Kids might feel obligated to maintain streaks, even with people they don’t like or trust. This can lead to bullying, exclusion, or feeling overly attached to social validation.
From Tide Pod challenges to “devious licks,” TikTok and Snapchat have a history of glorifying unsafe ideas. Younger kids and even tweens lack the critical thinking skills to spot danger. Snapchat’s streaks and group chats can intensify social pressures. Kids might feel obligated to maintain streaks, even with people they don’t like or trust. This can lead to bullying, exclusion, or feeling overly attached to social validation.
3. Stranger Danger Is Very Real
And one of the most obvious - TikTok and Snap are both public platforms where strangers can comment, message, and interact with posts and your child. And Snap adds another insidious level because, the content and messages disappear. Snapchat’s Snap Map feature lets friends see exactly where your child is in real time. While this may seem harmless, and can be helpful - it also exposes them to potential safety risks.
What About Older Kids?
I’m not saying lock TikTok and Snap away forever. For high schoolers (and some middle schoolers), it’s fine - with limits. Set boundaries, take a “parental temperature check” (you should be able to look at their device without them freaking out - regularly), and teach online safety. Say it with me "Social media isn’t a diary!" It’s public, and kids need to understand that!!
Internet education starts the moment your child gets their first device, even an iPad. Teach them about privacy, screen time, and questioning what they see online. By the time they’re older, they’ll understand you’re not invading their privacy by checking devices—you’re keeping them safe.
Parenting in the digital age isn’t easy, but it’s easier than undoing the damage and mental toll caused by unrestricted social media access. Let your kids live Social media free a little longer. They might not thank you now - or ever but you’ll know you did the right thing.
As an adult who enjoys TikTok, I get it. The app is addictive, and even I have to set limits. I’m mindful of feeding the algorithm so it gives me back parenting hacks, educational dives, hilarious skits, and recipes. Content creation? It relaxes me and allows me to create. When I include my kids, I focus on the educational side: scripting, editing, writing, and using imagination.
But here’s the thing: while TikTok works for me, it’s not where I want my kids hanging out—at least, not yet.
I’m not saying lock TikTok and Snap away forever. For high schoolers (and some middle schoolers), it’s fine - with limits. Set boundaries, take a “parental temperature check” (you should be able to look at their device without them freaking out - regularly), and teach online safety. Say it with me "Social media isn’t a diary!" It’s public, and kids need to understand that!!
Internet education starts the moment your child gets their first device, even an iPad. Teach them about privacy, screen time, and questioning what they see online. By the time they’re older, they’ll understand you’re not invading their privacy by checking devices—you’re keeping them safe.
Parenting in the digital age isn’t easy, but it’s easier than undoing the damage and mental toll caused by unrestricted social media access. Let your kids live Social media free a little longer. They might not thank you now - or ever but you’ll know you did the right thing.
As an adult who enjoys TikTok, I get it. The app is addictive, and even I have to set limits. I’m mindful of feeding the algorithm so it gives me back parenting hacks, educational dives, hilarious skits, and recipes. Content creation? It relaxes me and allows me to create. When I include my kids, I focus on the educational side: scripting, editing, writing, and using imagination.
But here’s the thing: while TikTok works for me, it’s not where I want my kids hanging out—at least, not yet.
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