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Why I Embrace Device Time and Screen-Free Time with My Kids (Guilt-Free!)

Let’s be honest, parenting is a marathon, not a sprint. There are days when I feel like I'm crushing it—everyone's fed, the house is clean (ish), and I've even cleaned out my email inbox. And then there are days when the chaos is real, and all I want is to survive those days with some of my sanity intact and five minutes to drink my coffee while it's still hot. On those days and even the easy ones, I have zero guilt about handing my kids their devices. 


Sure, there’s a lot of talk about screen time these days, and when I started advocating for internet wellness over 10 years ago, it was one of my main concerns. But living in the real world with my  kids that are no longer babies or toddlers shifted my entire perspective and humbled me. iPads, our PS3, and our Smart TVs have saved my sanity more times than I can count! Whether it’s a Paw Patrol episode or an educational and fun YouTube video, I see it as a win-win. The kids are happy, entertained, and most times even learning something new, and I get a breather, a chance to regroup, recenter my mental, and tackle the next thing with a clear head.

I also had to get real honest with myself. The truth is—I love technology! I'm using tech right now to draft and publish this blog. I love coding, social media and the evolution of tech. I use my devices for fun, entertainment, and infotainment. I understand firsthand the allure of scrolling through feeds and the subtle pressure to share a curated version of my life. I understand how we are all being programmed by our feeds to consume or not consume certain products, to engage or not engage with current issues, to like or not like a particular celebrity. I get it. 


This is why I choose to be real and empathetic when discussing social media use with my kids. I'm honest with them about my own use, emphasize the importance of balance, make sure they take breaks, and try my best to model positive behavior by setting my own boundaries. I can't tell them to go outside if they never see me outside. I can't expect them to unplug if I am plugged into my device all the time. 

Modern parenting is an extreme sport - a juggling act!! Many of us are over scheduled and overstimulated, so there’s no shame in using every tool in our arsenal. Tech has helped me through grocery store meltdowns, long car rides, and those moments when I need to finish cooking dinner or just need some time to myself. And it’s not just mindless entertainment; there are amazing apps, shows, and YouTube channels out there that teach everything from phonics to math and coding and anything else you want to learn.

This is what internet wellness is all about and what I advocate for and believe in. For many of us, it's impossible and not even practical to avoid using tech; heck, many of us are scrolling more than our children! The key is to learn to embrace it in a healthy and balanced way. Its also important for us to educate children on ways to spend quality time when they are online by encouraging them to research current events and topics they are interested in or find the answers to their many questions. And, we can't forget the opportunities for creativity. Children can make videos or create their own content channels. They can also use sites like Canva for designs, videos, graphics and other sites like Blogger for writing. These are just a few of the ways that kids, tweens, and teens can have safe fun online while gaining new skills. 

Parenting is tough enough without adding unnecessary guilt into the mix. So, give yourself grace. We are among the first generation of parents who are raising kids that were born with social media and the internet at their finger tips and a part of their everyday lives. Work together as a family to find the healthy mix of digital interaction and real-world experiences, so that everyone gets the best of both worlds.

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